I do want to do….do what???

What happens out there in the wild is happening to me now: “You know, when you have to keep running, to stay alive all the time and yet you want to have fun!!”. I feel as though there is nothing more burdensome to load my already fucked up life. My baggage is getting heavier day by day. I ain’t a fucking George Clooney to just throw, all that’s in my bag, up in the air and keep flying. I ain’t one of those guys who does things either (I don’t talk much too (exception, her!). Now you tell me who am I…wait!! I don’t want no fucking nobody, to tell me some fucking thing!!).

I am walking on that thin line. I don’t even know if there is a line. It’s always two extremes. And even if there is a line, it is sharp. Fucking sharp!! Always trying to push me to one of those ugly sides. The voice is getting louder!! The heart is beating faster!! The curd is getting thinner!! Do I have a choice? I fucking don’t have a clue but I gotta make one. Why do I keep asking questions to which I already know the answers??? I now, am not, the Professor.

Life gives you choices. Beautiful choices. But they don’t stay beautiful forever, unless you choose them to be. Perception of the mankind changes, fore’er. But hold on to it, if you don’t want things to get real ugly!!! There ain’t going to be no good thing that’s going to happen, over me hollering like Janice (Oh! My! God! Chandler Bing! ehaaaahaaaahaaaah – am sorry, I can’t match her howl. No wait! I’m not sorry! Fuck You, if you think I did it wrong.). And nobody on WordPress is going to cry on my behalf too. WTF!! Who cares!!

I am irritating, but equally amazing too. Why don’t people see that thing? Why don’t things happen on their own? It’s on me!!! Every little thing!! But I choose not to give up. I do want to do….do what???