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My life is Brilliant!!

December 21, 2011

THIS GAP, this generation gap, its killing me!!!! I have multiple shoes to fill in at the same time. It’s funny and I am  laughing while writing this down. I seriously don’t know what I want!! Haha!!! I guess, that’s goooood in a way. Everything’s good!! The exact reason I believe is, I don’t like rules, what so ever, in any form. I want my life to be free flowing. But at the same time, I am bound by some of these rules or rather I’d just say obligations. And they primarily are all-important.

It is wonderfully surprising how my mind works. When I am near some one near or dear I would want them to be happy. I feel, I have to live for them and not hurt them in any way. I have been this kind, all my life, at least till now. But when other worldly intentions take over, it is utter chaos. I am not clear anymore of what is important and what is not!! Which path should I choose and which not!!

I have known the reason for a long time. It’s this GAP which I am talking about. I want to live two parallel lives, simultaneously, one which is a few decades old and the other which is the present, the western-Indian way. One is peaceful and the other is exciting. The latter constantly thrills you. But, you need both to identify yourself. Live just one and you’ll miss the other thing. In fact, I now realize that I am lucky in a way to experience both. I am pretty sure, not many can handle such situations. They’d just run away, cos it’s too damn hard!!!

So, which one should I choose? I know which one I want, but won’t take that cos it’s crowded and unpleasant a lot of times. But I’ll keep trying to build this bridge which will allow me to go to either side without any hindrance. If there is any impediment, damn it, I’ll just kick that aside. ;) My life is brilliant!!

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